Friday, February 25, 2011

Night time

Well, tonight I cannot sleep for the life of me, so I am going to watch a movie,with the name of "The Corporation " I shall write a review after sleeping, waking up and coming back to blogging. I actually went on a retreat where (GASP!) I was not allowed any sorts of electronics, sorry any readers, that is if I have any secrect fans out there :) Well, I am very sorry for my absence. Life is a TAD hectic at this moment, but hopefully I can get to doing this more often, I rather enjoy blogging!
To start, the conferance was incredible. I met so many people, and had such an incredible fantastic wonderful amazing time. Something I will certainly never forget. I laughed, I cried, but all and all it was such a wonderfull experience. I cannot thank the people in charge enough for allowing people that sort of experience. It was hopefully one of those weekends I remember forever.
 One thing that did stand out was that , by the last night, gosh did I ever want to go home. I missed people, and my bed. familliar things. This scares me, moving out is basically this experience times... 100. It is frightening to think of.
 Another rather frightening thought I had was when I was with Alex, and I started to think about death. As an agnostic ( I think this is a word for a non hard core athiest, but if it is actually a religion sorry ) I do not beleive there is anything after death. This is a scary as hell idea. At some point in time, I just will not exsist. Now I know this is the cycle of life, and this is how life works, but god is it ever scary. I rather enjoy exsisting, I love my life, and well, gosh, thinking about it makes my mind crawl with sinister thoughts, so new topic.
 Love, how does one tell that they are in it? How can you be sure you feel real love towards a person. As many people say, you just know. But what is the definitive difference. It is something that has plaqued my mind for a few days, mayhaps weeks. How can one truly know they are in love, as oppossed to lust or extreme like. Love is certainly comitment, but anyone is comitted until something is over. If something ends, there is a lack of comitment right? So that does not quite work. A willingness to commit may be a check towards love, but not neicassarily.
I duunnno, But My movie is done downloading, so this shall be continued :)

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